


you seem to be a lot more happier (and eventually i have to let you go)

by taichi



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Tags Are Hard, i wouldn't call this angst tbh, kagehina are exes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:00:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24076375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taichi/pseuds/taichi
Summary: "So what will happened between us, now?" Hinata asked."You go to your ways and I'll go with mine. That's what gonna happen."
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou & Kageyama Tobio
Comments: 17
Kudos: 150





	you seem to be a lot more happier (and eventually i have to let you go)

**Author's Note:**

> hello! happy reading :D got the inspiration to write this fic based on this amazing [art](https://twitter.com/neroinkboi/status/1257384907686531075)! by [nero](twitter.com/neroinkboi)!

There are these uneasy feelings that linger upon Tobio’s mind. He’s not quite sure what it is, but he’s been feeling this ever since he met the Black Jackals’ members in the hallway near the bathroom. Actually, no, it’s not that. These feelings came exactly after Atsumu declared that Hinata is his wing spiker — and he thought these weird and strange feelings would leave his mind soon, but sadly it doesn’t go away as he thought it would be. The thought of Hinata being Atsumu’s wing spiker never left his mind.

Maybe because that was also a way for Atsumu to say to Tobio that Hinata is his boyfriend now. Hinata is his wing spiker, on top of that, he's also his boyfriend so don't get too close. Maybe that was what Atsumu was trying to say. But even if it's true, it doesn't explain the uneasiness he felt.

It was just one sentence, but that one sentence is powerful enough to keep his mind occupied. _Wouldja mind to not pickin’ a fight with my wing spiker, hmmm?_ That’s what he said earlier.

It’s only that one sentence but what are these feelings building up inside him? When Hinata spiked Atsumu’s ball, and he screamed out of joy the moment the ball dropped, saying that he’s here, that he’s back, that the Hinata Shoyo is here, what is this weird feeling he’s feeling right now? He couldn't really figure it out. But if he were to put these feelings into words maybe it's a dislike? Irritated?

 _Okay_ , _and so what? Why is that irritates me like this?_

Maybe, it's true. It's true that he doesn't like it. He doesn't like this at all. Don't get him wrong, he is perfectly fine with Hinata being his opponent, but he doesn't like it when he's on the same team as Atsumu. He doesn't like it when it's Atsumu who toss him the ball, he doesn't like it when he spikes Atsumu's ball, he doesn't like it when they both are being happy, giving each other's high five, smiling towards each other after they both succeeded scoring.

He doesn't like this because he used to do it all alongside Hinata. He used to be the one who tosses him the ball, Hinata used to spike his ball, they both used to be happy when they score a point. It's true that they don't do high fives like what Hinata does with Atsumu, but the feeling after they scored with his toss and Hinata's spikes were just something amazing. He used to feel that amazing feeling with Hinata.

 _Maybe I haven't gotten used to seeing Hinata receiving someone else's toss._ Tobio thought. _But it has been five years?_

He doesn't like this.

And that, without him realizing, made his spikes were way more aggressive than before. But the aggressive spikes only happened when Hinata was placed in the front. That made Hinata had to face Tobio's spikes in order to block them, causing him to endure cuts and few minor injuries.

The powerful and aggressive spikes felt as if Tobio was trying to say something to Hinata through his spikes, but sadly Hinata didn't get it at all as because Tobio is confused with himself too, not realizing that his spikes are getting more aggressive as the match goes and he just finally realized it when Hinata's fingers started to bleed, they had to take him out from the court to get treatment. By that time he can sense a pair of eyes giving him a death glare and people being sad over Hinata having to leave the court.

_He's bleeding. He's bleeding. Was it because of me?_

"Was it jealousy, Tobio-kun?" Atsumu asked as he smirked. No, not that smirk. It's that one you do when you're degrading someone. That one you make when you see someone so low.

Tobio is being confronted by Atsumu regarding what he did earlier. He just froze in front of the couple sitting in front of him. His eyes glanced upon Hinata's injuries which are right now being held by Atsumu's hands.

_Did I do that?_

"I don't know what you're talking about, Atsumu-san," he answered, eyes averting to Atsumu's glance now.

Because, truth to be told, he doesn't know what is Atsumu talking about. _Jealousy? Is he joking?_

"You are a jerk, aren't ya, Tobio?"

_Maybe he's not joking._

"Right now, you see his fingers wrapped in a bandage with some bloodstains on it, _who_ do you think caused this?"

_I did this, didn't I?_

"Over and over again every time Shoyo was placed in front, you targeted him and your spikes are getting more and more aggressive. Do you realize that?"

_I just finally did._

"Why would you do that? You know that it's not his fault that he spikes my ball. Not his fault either that the fact he's on the same team as me. It's not his fault he's **my** boyfriend." Atsumu tried as hard as he can to keep his voice low. He don't want to wake up Hinata who's currently sleeping on his shoulder. "You're so low for this."

It was never Tobio's intention to hurt Hinata. His mind was occupied with something that irritates him, something he dislikes, and he didn't realize it caused this. But this isn't just something irritating. It's something more. Maybe Atsumu was right. Maybe this is indeed jealousy. He wants what Atsumu has. All the things he used to do with Hinata, the fact that Atsumu is his boyfriend, the fact that both of them are in love and the fact that Hinata seems to be a lot happier right now.

He wants to be the one who tosses the ball for Hinata, he wants Hinata to be the one that spikes his tosses, he still wants Hinata next to him, he still wants to do all the things he used to do together with him, he wants to call him _**his**_ wing spiker. They were both happy, but now Tobio can't have Hinata on his arms and he has just now realized that after these five years he's still in love with Hinata.

"I'm sorry," Tobio bowed.

"Apologize to the one you hurt. Later, when he's awake."

—

Tobio and Hinata were never boyfriends. Despite that, there was something between them, and it was love. Tobio confessed his love on the school volley court. The moon was already out and the rest of Karasuno members' have left school and went home. There was no one left but him and Hinata. They were practicing their toss and spikes. When they were resting just before they went home, Tobio uttered the word out of nowhere.

Tobio was laying down with his hand towel covered his eyes. "I like you, you know..."

Hinata's mind couldn't proceed with what Tobio meant by that time. He thought Tobio had someone he liked and was practicing his lines before actually saying it. He even joked about how the Kageyama Tobio is currently having a crush at someone by that time.

"You dumbass I was talking to you."

And by that very moment, Hinata was also confessed his love. But Tobio for a reason he didn't know, was scared of commitments, and Hinata didn't really push him about the whole boyfriend things, so they both agreed to just stay the way they are right now. After all, _boyfriends_ were just a label, that's what they thought. Boyfriends were just a label because they both did the things boyfriends do, they were in love, and that was what matters.

After graduation, Tobio decided to give him one final toss before Hinata off to Brazil, and before Tobio himself joined the V League.

"So what will happened between us, now?" Hinata asked. His fingers traced the ball.

"You go to your ways and I'll go with mine. That's what gonna happen," Tobio answered.

"See you, Kageyama." he smiled, so brightly. He's happy. He's happy to have spent his years in high school doing what he like alongside his other teammates and of course with the one he loved.

"Yeah. See you."

—

Tobio walks his way with the rest of Schweiden Adlers' members to the parking lot, ready to go home. By the stadium entrance, he can see that the sun is just starting to set, and there, he found Hinata just a few steps in front of him, laughing with Atsumu and the rest of Black Jackals' members. The sun illuminated his face, making him sparks so brightly. He's beautiful. He's always been beautiful.

"You guys can go first. I'll talk with Hinata for a second," said Tobio to his teammates. "Don't leave me behind."

His teammates nod and left Tobio who fastens his pace to reach Hinata, "Hey, Hinata,"

Hinata and all Black Jackals' members turned to Tobio. That of course, including Atsumu.

"Hey, Kageyama, what's up?" he greeted as he waved his right hand, the same hand who have injuries from earlier.

"Sho-kun, we will wait on the bus," Atsumu said. "Don't take too much time or we'll leave you." he continued as he sticks his tongue out. He drags his teammates to the parking lot, leaving Hinata and Tobio alone on the stadium entrance. Atsumu noticed that Tobio not only wants to apologize because of earlier today. He figured there is something more he wants to say to Hinata. It's written all over Tobio's face. Though Atsumu doesn't know if Tobio will be able to say things he wanted to say to Hinata, whether he did or not, it's none of his business.

"Tsumutsumu why are we leaving Hinata?"

"Shut up we're not leaving him, let's go."

Schweiden Adlers, as well as Black Jackals' members, left them to their own buses and now they're both standing alone facing each other. There's no one near them. They can hear the sound of afternoon wind, the birds chirping, and distant chatter from their friends. Tobio starred at Hinata a little bit too long. Probably because of the afternoon's ray of shine which illuminating his face. He observed Hinata, up from his head down to his toe. He's taller than he used to before, he cut his hair and he's getting more muscles. His appearance changed a bit and yet he's still the same. He's still the Hinata Shoyo he knows. His smile never changed either, just, a little bit more wider and a little bit more happier.

"How are your injuries? Are you okay?"

Hinata raises his right hand in front of his face. "It still hurts but it's okay, and yeah. I'm fine,"

Tobio silenced. Somehow this reminds him of the time when they went to the nationals for the first time. It was a match against Kamomedai. Hinata had a high fever so he had to leave the court. He was crying, he didn't want to leave the court, he wanted to continue the game, but he was unable to do that. There was a slight fear inside Tobio's mind that Hinata, leaving the court because of injuries he had to endure from his spikes will let him down again. But after seeing his face just right now, and hearing he himself saying that he's fine, a sigh of relief just left his mouth. He has grown, obviously.

"I'm sorry. My spikes are... unexpectedly getting more and more aggressive towards you," he apologized.

"Yeah, I figured. Are you okay, Kageyama?"

No. 

He's not okay. _I don't like seeing you with Atsumu._

"I just got irritated by something, that's all,"

"And you let it out with your spikes towards me? Jeez, that's harsh, Kageyama," he pouted.

_I hurt you. I'm sorry._

"That's why I'm sorry, dumbass. Next time I'll take care of my emotional being before entering the court so this kind of accident won't ever occur again,"

"Ha! You better be!"

And they both went silent again. This time they both only can hear the sound of wind and the birds chirping. They can't hear any more distant chatter from their friends as because they all have already got inside to each bus.

"Are you happy now?" Tobio asked out of blue. It's not something Tobio would ask, that's what Hinata was thinking, but somehow Hinata doesn't feel like to joke about this. Maybe of all these years, Tobio have finally got comfortable in expressing his feelings.

"Yeah. I'm happy," he answered with a smile. "Are you?"

Tobio didn't answer. Is he happy? Yeah, he is. But there's something missing. And that something missing is now standing before him. He can easily reach him but he can't. He's not gonna look at him the same way he used to before.

"Shoot, Kageyama, I need to go now," Hinata said as he checked on his watch. The time has shown at 6:30 PM.

_Please don't go._

"We'll catch up more sometime later. See you!" he clenched his fist to Tobio.

_If bumping his fist means a goodbye, I don't want it._

Tobio bumped his fist and after that, Hinata left him alone by the stadium entrance. Tobio wanted to hug Hinata so badly. He wants to hug him in his arms, he wants to ruffle and smell his hair, he wants to do anything he used to do before to him, he wants to do anything he wasn't able to do to him. But now he can't. Hinata is too far for him to reach.

Atsumu waited for Hinata by the bus door with open arms, and Hinata hugged him. Atsumu kissed his nose and he became a blushing mess. For no reason, Tobio smiled seeing that. Hinata is happy. Happier than he was the last time he saw him years ago. Maybe something had happened in those years he didn't see him, and maybe Atsumu treated Hinata way better than he was before, but whatever it is, it makes the ball of joy Hinata Shoyo way much happier than he was before.

On the bus, Tobio keeps thinking about all the what-ifs. What if he weren't so scared of commitments, what if he and Hinata were boyfriends, would they last long up until today? Will Atsumu doesn't come near Hinata though his crush towards him ever since they met the first time at nationals was obvious? Will Tobio still have Hinata by his arms right now? But it's no use to keep thinking about the what-ifs. The time will always go forward, everything is moving forward, he has to do the same too, or else he'll be stuck miserably inside his own memories.

_"So what will happened between us, now?"_  
_"You go to your ways and I'll go with mine. That's what gonna happen."_

And so, he let the memories stay. Instead of regretting what he did in the past, he treasured and cherished the precious memories he had. Because eventually, everything has to end, eventually he had to let him go.

**Author's Note:**

> and here it is... my first hq fic and my first writing in two years lmao. i hope you enjoyed it! <3


End file.
